Päätin tässä päivänä eräänä huvittaa itseäni, kun muistin Bridget Jonesin päiväkirja -tyyliin kirjoitetut Taru sormusten herrasta Very Secret Diaries, kirjoittamalla omani. Sillä on hämärä perusta todellisuudessa, mutta sitä ei tule ottaa kovin vakavasti. ;-)

Niin, ja en nyt jaksa kääntää sitä suomeksi. :p

The Very Secret Diary of Beisla

Day 1. Arrived on farm, and am learning to ride motorbikes. Seem v. cool! V. many sheep here.

Day 2. Found out today we’ll be crutching all the sheep. Ah, well, they seem quite scared of people so should be pretty easy. Note to self: riding motorbikes sideways on a hill not v. good idea. Not sick of sheep yet.

Day 3. Sheep quite reluctant to get into pens, but am having fun with electric prodder. Must find our how many sheep I can fit into a pen. Sheep beaten up: 2. Still not sick of sheep.

Day 7. Hope to finish crutching soon. There sure are a lot of sheep here. Electric prodder broke. Bummer. Have found out sheep feel no pain. Sheep beaten up: 38. Not even close to being sick of sheep.

Day 20. Have started lambing. Orphan lambs v. cute! Got our first three in today. Am feeding them from bottle. Not sick of lambs yet.

Day 29. Currently have 56 lambs to feed. Some definitely not playing with a full deck of cards. How hard is it to learn to drink from a bottle? Would punch them, but lambs too cute and anyway, sheep feel no pain. Definitely still loving the lambs.

Day 40. Said good-bye to last of orphan lambs today. Am still sad. Lambs were v. sweet. Know lambs must have loved me, as I smelled more of milk than the ewes. Nope, not sick of lambs yet.

Day 42. Have started docking. Am concerned with how lambs feel about having their tails burnt off. Also wondering what I could make of the left-over tails. Am in charge of giving vaccinations. Yay! Have always loved sharp pointy things. Not sick of lambs today either.

Day 45. Why did no one tell me how hard lambs can kick? On the upside, have now given myself 6 tetanus boosters. Not sick of lambs yet.

Day 59. Last day of docking today. Hooray! Have not managed to wash off smell of burnt wool and flesh. Have decided to go vegetarian. Possibly vegan. Unless I see another sheep again, as I might feel the need to kill it.